the epiphany.
Went to a rave Friday night. Jessica, Vernon, and me. I went with the intention of rolling. These guys didn’t know if they wanted to or not. Using my charm and power of persuasion-they changed their minds ;) They came up with a little competition, just for fun, not anything too serious. But they wanted to compete to see who could make out with more people that night. These people had to be HOT. Like smokin hot. I was bitter when they told me I could not participate. They said I always attract hella people, and it would be an unfair competition cuz they know I’d win. So they excluded me! Out of spite-I said I wouldn’t make out with anyone that night! Hahaha. After we located some thizzles and popped, we started dancing. We purposely left our phones at home so we wouldn’t have any way of telling time. Doing this forces us to live in the moment, and enjoy everything as much as we can, because we never know how much time we have before it’s all over (a bit symbolic, if ya ask me). Oh btw the event was held at an outdoor venue. So at one point in the night it started to rain…just slightly at first, then there was a few minutes where it really started pouring down. By this point I was rollin my face off, standing shoulder to shoulder with thousands of other ravers, so crowded I can only jump up and down vertically, trance music engulfing my mind, and I felt connected. -connected to the music, connected to everyone around me, connected to the universe and connected to the concept PLUR itself. It was quite transcendental…this euphoria stuck with me through the rest of the night. And it granted me the realization that I am so lucky. I am so lucky to live in this beautiful place. I am so lucky to be surrounded by these amazing people. I am so lucky to live this unbelievably free lifestyle; where I need nothing and no one else to complete me. All I need is myself. I am happy and content with who I am, and where I’m going in life. I don’t need any other human being to accredit me any fulfillment. I have a strong faith God, and supportive circle of family and friends, and the luxury of doing whatever I want, whenever I want, with whoever I want to do it with. And as much as I love and miss the X, I don’t need him. I love the love that we shared- but it’s not a necessary ingredient to my recipe for happiness. I feel incredibly grateful to have all the things that I have, and vow to continue expressing gratitude to those people who make a positive difference in my life. If he has any desire to become part of my life again, then he must take initiate to become part of it. Otherwise, I really don’t need him.
peace.love.unity.respect.
